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Kiss & Tell

The news has been saturated with stories about Tiger Woods and his alleged infidelities that supposedly caused the ruckus at his Deacon Circle home in Isleworth, Florida. Images of a mad housewife with a nine iron chasing the world’s best golfer causing him to flee in a Cadillac Escalade are seared in my mind. Like the poodle in the Bud Lite commercial that runs over a fire hydrant while displaying his driving skills.

Since the story broke every other day another woman falls out of a tree saying that she had sex with Tiger Woods.

David Letterman used his Late Night with David Letterman Show to disclose the fact that he’d had affairs with women from his production staff. This information surfaced after a producer for 48 Hours found evidence of the affair while going through his girlfriends’ diary she was a staffer for letterman and the diary contained information about the Letterman liaisons.

While promoting her new book McKenzie Phillips of TV sitcom One Day at a Time fame (daughter of John Phillips of the Mammas and Pappas of sixties folk songs) speaks frankly about the incestuous relationship she had with her now deceased father. Well, Puff the Magic Dragon! (Sorry, I couldn’t help it.)

To be completely honest, I don’t care- this is too much information.

For the sake of news and infotainment it is now appropriate to splash sexual dirt about anyone via the so-called-news. It doesn’t just stop on the news gossip has been around since man has learned to speak. The national and especially cable news simply reflects what happens when you stir up the bottom of a dirty aquarium. Locally the gossips don’t make it on the news but Syracuse being a small community you don’t need a bull horn to ruin someone by rumor or innuendo.

There otta be a law that makes malicious personal business i.e., gossip, disclosure of affairs and other excrement against the law. Imagine the backlog there would be in the courts with people suing each other over their personal business! I can see it now, Plaintiff; Joe Jones vs. defendant; Mary Smith case number 157 “Mary Smith called me a man hoe!”

The law would be called the Kiss and Tell Law which invokes punitive measures for telling what happened in bed or on the couch or….you get the drift.

These times are troubling enough with unemployment hitting record levels we’re debating national health insurance options, we’ve been at war for almost 9 years and we’re talking about, as the British would say, “somebody’s naughty bits”.

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