Removing Trans-fats from Local television News

Can someone please tell me why we have 90 minutes of local news? (Crickets chirping) I grew up watching local news anchored by the venerable Ron Curtis and nationally CBS’ Walter Cronkite followed by Dan Rather.

If there was “Breaking News” the network or local affiliate would interrupt entertainment programming in order to handle a hot topic.

An hour and a half of recipes, stories run so many times that you can recite them verbatim to others. And now you the viewer can contribute clips to the news, another cheap method of attracting young viewers without payin’ the help. “And we’re cooking homemade stew right after our break.”

When it comes to diversity every crime is committed on “the South Side” even when it’s clearly somewhere else. Television News vehicles should be equipped with a compass.

I could understand an hour and a half if there actually was NEWS during the bulk of that time. But like Gar Gum and stabilizers in low quality Ice Cream, the banter, chit chat, “Oh, its little Johnnie’s Birthday” all amount to Trans-fatty substances clogging the arteries of local news.

90 minutes? No “Specials” no real programs to address diversity of opinion on the air when it comes to local news I’m running out of reasons to tune in.

War rages in Afghanistan and Iraq, people are fighting each other over food in the Caribbean. “Meow” there’s the weather critter, just once I’d like to see him throw a hissy-fit on camera. And News Anchor, Jackie Robinson would say, “Ladies and gentlemen we have to apologize for the behavior of our employee. He’s experiencing cat nip addiction”- Now that’s local news.